Annoy Kane's and Friends
by C00K13 QU33N
Summary: Ended to make room for the other 'annoy' fic. Thanks to the people that reviewed.
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome to... ANNOY KANE'S AND FRIENDS! We're going to tell you what kind of pranks and such that annoy the Kane crew (and others) to where they will want to kill you! Since this is the first one, we'll start with the easiest to trick: Carter! **

1. Run into his room screaming "Zia's dating Set!" When he doesn't believe you, photoshop a picture of Zia and Set to make it look like they're kissing. When he goes into hysterical fits of sobbing, laugh and point at him screaming, "HAHAHAHAHA APRIL FOOLS, LOSER!" even though it's not April 1st anymore.

2. Sneak your way into his Duat locker and grab Leroy and stuff him in Carter's clothing drawer. Grab some popcorn and watch Carter wear his sister's clothes until they get him new ones.

3. Replace the orange juice in his glass with Germ-X that you put orange food coloring in. At the E.R., point at him and laugh, "You should have seen your face!"

4. Stand behind him in a line (ex. food court at the mall) and whisper to the person behind you, occasionally saying things like "Carter..." and "Zia hates him..." while looking Carter straight in the eye.

5. Every time he says the word Zia, say reeeeeally loudly, "YOU MEAN THE GIRL THAT HATED YOU SO MUCH, SHE SENT A SHABTI INSTEAD?"

6. For his birthday, give him a box full of live fruit bats. You know he'll love them.

7. Dial his phone number and when he says "Hello?" Breathe heavily and whisper, "Seven days..."

8. While he's in the shower, flush the toilet. Once he stops crying, flush it again.

him that Zia wanted to go to the movies with him, tell him to go to an address (which is coincidentally Liz and Emma's house). Once he comes home covered in lipstick kisses and tattered clothing, get Zia in the same room so she screams at him for "Cheating on her".

10. Give Zia a book of his naked baby pictures. Nuff said.

**Next we're going to bother Sadie! I am not responsible for how badly she harms you. Any requested characters to be bothered may or may not be added! Thank you for your time and be here next time on... ANNOY KANE'S AND FRIENDS!**


	2. Chapter 2

Welcome back to episode 2 of…ANNOY KANE'S AND FRIENDS! Today we are going to annoy the one, the only….SADIE KANE! Here she is now! What do think of the show so far, Miss Kane?

"It's a complete waste of time! Get a life, hippie!"

Right you are, Sadie! Right, you are… *cough* anyway, here are your 10 ways to annoy Sadie Kane!

1. Tell her that Anubis has a super-hot girlfriend.

2. Give her a potion that transforms her into a kite. Make sure that it doesn't wear off for three days.

3. Say that her British accent is stupid and ask if her teeth are crooked.

4. Make a shabti Anubis and have it ask her out. A few 'dates' later, have it dump her. While she sobs traumatically, get the ACTUAL Anubis to come. Watch as she punches him in the nose. Laugh.

5. For Christmas, give her a crate of nothing but Friskies.

6. Tease her relentlessly about naming her cat 'Muffin'.

7. Find her alone with Anubis. Scream really loudly, "SADIE KANE LOOOOOOOOVES ANUBIS!" Run. FAST.

8. Remind Sadie of that night at the Needle. As she sobs, have a laughing fit on the floor.

9. Bring her a copy of The Red Pyramid. Drag her to Anubis and read the chapter 'I Have a Date with the God of Toilet Paper' to him.

10. Remember the time she gave a note to Geb from Nut? Ask her to give Anubis a letter from you that has a heart sticker on the front and is written in pink pen and pretty cursive.

Well wasn't that fun? I mean, sure I was in the hospital for three weeks, but it was worth it! Poor Anubis is still traumatized :P Sooooorry! Next up: Julius Kane! (why on earth is he blue?)

Oh, look! There's Carter! Hiya Cart!

"ZIA STILL WONT EVEN LOOK AT ME!"

Ha ha, too bad, so sad. :P

THE GRAPHIC VIOLENCE THAT FOLLOWS IS TOO HARSH FOR THE YOUNGUNS TO READ.

So *pant* be sure to *cough up blood* read the next installment of *collapse on floor* ANNOY KANE'S AND *hacking cough* FRIENDS! *faint*


	3. Chapter 3

**I, ever so graciously, withdraw from Annoy Kane's and Friends. Why? Because (a) It would've gone nowhere and (b) someone else had the idea shortly after me. I know I submitted it first, but I will let the other person do it as they see fit. Plus I have ANOTHER story idea! I know what you're probably thinking 'C00K13 QU33N, don't you already have another story you're working on?' and the answer is YES! But, it's not going anywhere either so I'm working on a Sanubis! I know what you're thinking now 'GAH MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND!' well, TOO BAD! I'll do what I want TYVM. **

**Peace, hugs, and shirtless Anubis',**

**C00K13 QU33N**


End file.
